July 22, 2014

cohen's nursery + fawn design

isn't it a curious thing how we nest nest nest our babes little nursery into perfection even though it will be nothing more than a glorified gift storage room for upwards of 6 or more months

so curious

but you aren't human if it doesn't tickle some sort of maternal bone deep down to do it; so alas, nest away preggo mamas!

cohens nursery is stuck somewhere between random and colorful with no theme to be found. it all started when i painted some whimsical animal watercolors back when i was pregnant and the rest is history. there are a few pictures below of some of the details 

now on to another mystery of mommy hood. the diaper bag. the oh so important, ever coveted diaper bag. do you remember the days of winnie the pooh and plastic-y pink totes? they are (yay for us) GONE and in place are these stylish totes that honestly are better looking than any purse I've ever carried. 

when i was searching for a bag i knew i wanted something that had a few qualities - 

1. black. naturally, because every bag i own is black and because parker can feel like a "real man" with a black bag
2. big. roomy, last thing i wanted was to organize. i just need to be able to throw it all in 
3. back packable. but not boxy. which, if you've been in the market, is quite the feet. 

well my search was to no avail. i was going into my 37th week with no diaper bag and no hope when out of the deep blue FAWN DESIGN caught my eye. oh my my my, what a beauty. and black and roomy and GOLD accents; really could it be more perfect? and not to mention the bee themed wipable lining (swoon)

so i snatched this beauty up. and in the process met the design jen, she is something pretty special. we talked about bag design over soup and i fell in love with her and her vision! she will be at craft lake city 
on august 9th with bags for sale (shop is currently closed to get ready for the event) so go find her!

July 17, 2014

1st week as a mama

first of all - ONE WEEK. 

actually one week and one day since my little squish was born. truly  unbelievable. the time really does whiz by. i can already see how people have 10 kids, newborns are addicting. 

they are so tender and innocent; and don't let anyone tell you otherwise, they have the most amazing personalities. cohen smiles and squeaks and he really doesn't like to be burped

there are a few funny/ odd/ sweet things about having a newborn i wanted to remember

#1 clothing is optional - for all parties. because honestly I've never had so much laundry. so unless we are leaving the house neither of us is really dressed between nursing, diaper changes and baths

#2 go with your gut. before i had cohen i read quite a few parenting books. everything from let your baby cry (which, ya right) to kiss them 10 times a minute and hold them always. no matter which end of the spectrum you are on i think the important thing is its YOUR spectrum. you know what your baby needs and there is no shame in any parenting style. so put down all the books and get to know your babe, hone your intuition 

#3 everything you need or want is going to be exactly 2 inches out of arms reach. honestly. thirsty? too bad. phone ringing? it'll have to wait. i got a tip from a new mama who said "set up a little breastfeeding corner with snacks, drinks, phone + charger etc…"BRILLIANT, do it now. 

#4 the whole "sleep when their sleeping" is madness. the second co closes his eyes i have usually 1 hour to do everything in the world i need to do and try not to feel bad leaving him to sleep alone. it is hard work, usually coupled with me running in to make sure he is not every squirming a bit every 2 minutes - good way to lose the baby weight

#5 they are going to cry. i still remember the first night in the hospital parker and i would flinch and react to every squirm. and while I'm still very attentively- twitchy, I've managed to tone it down just a notch ;)

and lastly, enjoy every single second. every cry, every feeding and diapering and especially those sweet middle of the night moments when your babes eyes are open and they are looking at you like nothing else matters. you created them and they know it and it is beautiful. 

July 15, 2014

cohen russell allen // 7.9.14

last wednesday my world was changed forever; well not even changed, amplified.
amplified by like ten trillion.

 I've been debating what to share about cohen's birth. the whole thing is so personal yet i love the bond that establishes between women when it comes to birth so ill share a bit of my experience.

on wednesday morning at about 130 am i started to have teeny contractions (i studied hypnobabies & they encourage the use of the word pressure waves; but to me they are more contractions haha) and slept through a lot of them. then around 5am they started to get closer together and more painful but nothing crazy. id been having the feeling that this little man wanted to have an earlier birthday so i thought it was probably the day.

parker went to work around 7am and when he came home around 10 my contractions were about 3 minutes apart but the intensity was around the same. they got closer and closer and to a point id have to concentrate through them. we decided to watch turbo (great disney flick if your into that sorta thing) to keep my mind off of them.

when they were one minute long and 2 minutes apart we headed to the hospital. at this point i thought - oh yeah, I've got this natural thing. when we got to the hospital they put us in a sort of "in between room" where they can see if you are in labor enough to admit you.

i was a 3 "+" ; thanks for the plus but i was sort of in shock. a 3! come on; you feel like you've done so much work already when its just begun. after a few minutes my water broke, which feels amazing and then instantly not so amazing because it takes the contractions up like 47 levels. i realized what this birth thing was going to be about.

i can't describe the feeling besides that it made my eyes shake, and my whole body convulse so there's that ;)
at this point i knew i wanted an epidural. throughout my whole pregnancy i had prepared for anything. i knew my body could have a baby without assistance and i love that. but; i always knew i wanted that day to be perfect and at that point the pain was taking me away from how amazing it was supposed to be

cohen was posterior, which means he was facing my stomach instead of my back and wow; it makes for some not so fun back pain. and it usually means a longer labor.

at this point it was about 1pm and they told me they would admit me and get an IV and labs started for the epidural. this process ended up taking about 3 hours, in the meantime i don't really remember anything besides kneeling on the bed and parker (who is the most amazing can i say) trying to comfort me through the pain.

at 4 or so again I'm sort of out of it; the epidural magic man arrived.  and boy was i singing his praises. it takes 20 minutes to set it and that was long long enough.
when they put in my epidural i was a 6+
10 minutes later i was a 10! i couldnt believe it. my little man was on his way.

at 5:46pm cohen russell allen came into the world; straight from heaven and oh so perfect. he weighed albs 8oz and was 19.5 inches. i always want to remember the way he moves, sucks on and uses his hands always. his perfect wolverine hairline. the way he cries and how it sounds like he's saying "ya ya ya" when he is calming down. his hands and feet are just like parkers, and well so is his nose. and I'm a little biased but i think he is the most beautiful baby that has ever been born.

everyday i wake up feeling so blessed and eternally grateful he is now a part of our family. i can't wait to see him grow and teach him how to be the man his father is.

in the past 6 days i have teared up or full out balled for a million reasons from cohen's smile to pure exhaustion. and i everyone says how full of hormones you are but to me it feels a little bit like my body is adjusting to a part of it being out in the world. so vulnerable and new; and it is my job to protect it.

as we speak parker and cohen are cuddled up next to me on the bed and all i need is within my reach. life is really starting to make sense.

** pictures by the AMAZING desiree bell - check her out. http://desiredshots.blogspot.com
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